Edith "Little Edie" Bouvier Beale: You can't have your cake and eat it too, in life.The lines above are from the original "Grey Gardens" movie, the documentary filmed in 1979, and if you haven't seen that one then I highly recommend you rent it, if only because it will make you feel better about your own housekeeping abilities. I feel very safe in saying that, even though I haven't actually seen your house, or yours, or even yours, because Big Edie and Little Edie were, quite possibly, the original hoarders.
Edith "Big Edie" Bouvier Beale: Oh yes, I did. I did. I had my cake, loved it masticated it, chewed it and had everything I wanted.
But I digress. What got me thinking about the Edies was that today, all day, I cleaned my house and sorted through things and dragged a couple of bags of junk out to the trash, and then one of my neighbors stopped by and said something like, "Don't you wish you didn't have to sell your house?" and after she left I sat in the middle of the front parlor just staring at the stained glass windows there all teary-eyed. Of course I wish I didn't have to sell my house. I wish, like Big Edie, I could have my cake and eat it, too. In my case, "everything I wanted" would be both having the perfect guy and living in the perfect house with him. I can have half of that: either I can marry the perfect guy, and not live in the perfect house; or I can live in the perfect house and not marry the perfect guy. The former seems a better choice.
I read back through that paragraph I just wrote, and it sounds incredibly spoiled. It sounds like whining, and I hate whining. I hardly ever whine, and usually when I do someone smacks me. Maybe I need to be smacked. I mean, really, what in the Sam Hill do I have to complain about? I'm marrying a guy who is so thoughtful, kind, honest and loving that he really is darn near perfect. We'll be living in a house that's not in a constant state of renovation, doesn't have cracked plaster ceilings, and won't cost 300 bucks a month to heat. Those are good things. They are. Right? I mean, right. Right?? Someone smack me. Please.