In Which I Meet The New Building Inspector

We have a new building inspector in town.  My first inkling that a new "building sheriff" was in town was when I saw warning notices taped to the front doors of two houses in my neighborhood.  The first house (a cute little Victorian catty-corner from my house) is a foreclosure and has had a tarped roof for close to three years.  The other one (another Vic down the street) is in such bad shape that I think the only recourse may be to tear it down.  Then I started hearing talk around town about her:  she told the guy who owns the old Chinese restaurant that he couldn't paint the bottom half of his building pumpkin orange, she made the folks at Maid-Rite repaint their faded sign out front, she made people clean up the junk stacked in their yards, she's issuing warnings right and left. 

After all I heard, I expected her to look something like this:


Ursula from The Little Mermaid

In reality, she looks a bit like the actress Maura Tierney and I found her to be quite intelligent and pleasant.  I would not want to be in her shoes.  The mindset of "It's my property and I can do whatever the hell I want to with it" is rampant around here, and city ordinances relating to nuisances and Historic District violations have, in the past, been enforced hit-and-miss or not at all.  Add to that the good-ole-boys who don't want a woman telling them what to do, and the tendency of native Lexingtonians to view newcomers with a large amount of suspicion, and the woman can't help but become a lightning rod.  I, for one, am glad to see that she's trying to clean up the town and enforce the ordinances fairly and equally.  (Give me just a minute here to step down from my soapbox...)

Okay.  Now the reason I met the new Building Inspector is because I have well and truly lost my mind and I'm planning to repaint my whole entire house.  Because I live in the Old Neighborhoods National Register Historic District, I have to have my exterior paint colors approved.  (Incidentally, there are three other National Register Historic Districts in my little town of 4,700 people:  the Commercial District, surrounding the 1847 Lafayette County Courthouse; Highland Avenue, the mostly pre-Civil War houses built on the bluff overlooking the Missouri River; and Wentworth Military Academy, in operation as a private military school since 1880.) 

I stapled paint chips onto my Application for Certificate of Appropriateness (yes, that's really what it's called) along with an explanation:  Body of house, either Woodlawn Colonial Gray or Montepelier Ashlar Gray (I'm leaning towards Montpelier); Trim and window frames: Woodlawn Bedroom White; Window sashes, Lincoln Cottage Black (the color they are now); and other trim details, such as porch post bands and porch bracket details, Mark Twain House Ombra Gray.  All colors are Valspar National Trust For Historic Preservation Colors.   

After approval, I have--gulp!--180 days to complete the work or file for an extension.  To which Charlie said, "We better get to scrapin."  Not so fast.  The Bulding Inspector wanted to be sure we're compliant with EPA recommendations for lead paint removal, so she told me we have to wear long sleeves and pants, masks, eye protection, and we have to put plastic down on the ground and clean up the paint debris every night.  Long sleeves?  In June and July??  Oh well, I still like her.